Thursday, 7 May 2009


Little Kim was worryingly quiet. There was none of the usual grunting, none of the cheery biting of the pig "farmer's" feet, none of the jovial attempts to turn the "farmer" upside down*. She seemed ill.

Now I know what you're thinking and I'd appreciate it if you'd stop. You've all been watching too much "news" on the telly.

I put some food outside her hut. I put some food inside her hut. She ignored it, yawned a bit, slumped back down in the straw and looked very miserable.

I called Mrs Pig "Farmer" at work. It seems I'm an "insensitive pig". Didn't I realise that being split up from her sister and lifelong companion and then moved to a strange field would upset her? And had I considered it could be the time of the month (every three weeks for pigs)? And it's a surprisingly windy day for this time of year.

Sure enough, yesterday she was outside investigating, bumping into the pig "farmer" and exchanging GRUNTS with her mother Kim in the next paddock.

A chip off the old block

* Little Kim has all the attributes of a second row forward for a middle-ranking Rugby League side, Wakefield Trinity for instance. Superleague clubs can contact us at the usual address.


Jimmy Bastard said...

Not such a great deal of difference between pigs and humans after all.

Put one in a dress, give it a pint of bitter, bingo.. you could be back in the West Mids!

Yeah yeah.. an offensive remark, substitute West Mids for Glesga and we'll all feel better,.

Dave said...

Are pigs sensitive to sun in their eyes? What other explanation can there be for the eye-shades/ears.

I, Like The View said...

just like my children when they are apart from their siblings


Malc said...


You've obviously been on a night out in West Bromwich.


The ears are pretty handy. It's supposed to be one of the reasons Saddlebacks are more easy-going than other breeds.


I hope your brood don't slobber quite as much.

Anonymous said...

I love it! Very creative!That's actually really cool.