Sunday, 21 December 2008

Guess who's coming to dinner?


I was feeling quite pleased with myself. We'd managed to deal with a couple of wind-related crises, Tommy Ramone (having met a quick and quiet end) was butchered and I had already trousered some of The Bank of Scotland's crispest as a result.

Work on the kitchen had made great advances during the week, Mrs Pig "Farmer" was set to make a weather-delayed return to the island to start her Christmas holliers - yep, I was in a good mood.

I'd been to the village and returned to find the front door and kitchen door wide open - not a good idea in a howling gale, I'm sure you'll agree.

Spike was hovering about, looking very worried and not a little confused. There was a disturbance at the other end of the kitchen and I was a bit surprised to see Molly the sow tucking into the veg peelings bucket.

My stepdaughter Amy responded to my pitiful plea for help and between us we ushered Moll back to the pigshed where she'd previously shifted the barrier (a telegraph pole, pallet and two sheep hurdles strapped together) and wandered through the door the pig "farmer" had carelessly left open.

Straw and feed was distributed liberally, the pig "farmer" screwed in a few more pieces of wood to secure the barrier before collapsing into a chair.

I bloody hate windy days.

7 comments:

Gin said...

I was always told by my farmer grandparents that the first rule of farming is this..."If you find a gate closed, leave it closed. If you find a gate opened, leave it opened." I will assume that the same applies to doors!

Excuse me while I roll on the floor in bursts of unbridled laughter!! The vision of a pig in the kitchen is priceless... especially of BIG pigs!!!

I'm glad your butchering went off without a hitch.

Have a great holiday!!

P.S. What is/are "Christmas holliers"??

zIggI said...

good old Molly!
Wishing a very merry Christmas to you and yours Malc
Xx

Dave said...

Get many still days up there, do you?

Have a great Christmas.

I, Like The View said...

hey - look on the good side

at least she found the vegetable peelings! what else might she have scoffed. . .

your hammer must do overtime!

lots of love and all the festive best for the season

(-:

Yorkshire Pudding said...

It's not like that in the West Midlands you know! However, I'd rather have a hungry sow than a hoodie with a knife and a drug habit. Merry Christmas.

Richard said...

I heard they had gusts of 194 mph on Cairngorm. Sounds like you got off with a stiff breeze.

Have a good one, Malc. I'm having outdoor reared pork this year, btw and looking forward to it.

Zabigdog said...

Aagh! No picture!!? Merry Christmas!