Listening to: Oasis on Channel 4
Is: Liam going bald?
Actually: he looks a bit like Peter Cook these days
Good news! Molly has come into season and, having kept Boss hanging on a bit, the deed is being done, possibly as you read this.
So, assuming Boss has the right amount of lead in his pencil, we could have piglets in three months, three weeks, three days - which I reckon to be Tuesday March 24.
Otherwise, meself and the lad are off to town tomorrow in search of a pub with Sky Sports to see the Wolves v Birmingham game. It's always a horrible, horrible fixture, easily the most violent (off the field) on the Championship calendar, but there's just a chance the heroes in gold and black could go nine (yes, NINE) points clear at the top.
It's all bound to go nastily wrong, but football's all about dreams - and we might have a nice lunch too.