Listening to: Altamont (Echo and the Bunnymen)
Elbow is: throbbing
Popping: painkillers like Smarties
Now: the end of my finger has swelled up
I'm not: a hypochondriac really
It's nice to have things you can do as a couple - helps keep a marriage strong, I believe.
Mrs Sort-of Pig Farmer was towering above me. I was in a trench, covered in mud from the waist down and water was seeping into my boot.
"Can you see where the problem is yet?"
That's the trouble with a private water supply - lovely and romantic, but you've got to fix it yourself if it goes wrong.
Marcus was topping the bottom field (cutting the grass to tidy up and stop weeds spreading) the other day and damn nearly got his tractor stuck on a marshy patch between the pump house and the main road, right above the pipe that supplies the house.
We had a chat and, true to form, Marcus got to the heart of the problem within a couple of minutes, swiftly digging a hole to expose the pipe and a suspicious looking joint. All we had to do was mend it.
I spent the best part of two hours trying to deal with it. The pipe wasn't fixed properly to the joint and the two sections didn't seem long enough to allow it to be fixed properly. I pulled, pushed, wiggled, jiggled and swore loudly.
Mrs SPF came down to help.
"There are two joints there and the bit inbetween is about an inch short. Just unscrew it all and replace it."
We found some black pipe around the back of the barn, I cut a bit off, unscrewed everything, put it back together with the new piece, switched the pump back on and watched as water gushed out everywhere.
I got back in the trench, fumbled around in the two-foot deep water and managed, eventually, to detach everything again. The new pipe was too big. We didn't have any of the right diameter so it was back to the old piece and more of the aforementioned pulling, pushing etc.
Eventually, with a lot of patience, we emerged damp, muddy and smug at having managed to fix something ourselves.
There's a big difference in the water pressure too, especially in the caravan where father-in-law was nearly blown backwards out of the shower this morning.
And Mrs SPF thinks I'm really clever even though she had all the best ideas. Result.