Listening to: Truth and Lies (The Levellers)
Weather: damp and windy
Don't touch: it hurts
Here's one: for all you grapple fans
"Hang on, you're an office worker, you bloody idiot!"
My body sometimes talks to me like that. I was in Kirkwall and my arms were in spasms after my introduction to all-in pig wrestling.
"I can't pull the handbrake on," I said, through gritted teeth. Mrs Sort-of Pig Farmer obliged, then handed me a bottle of Lucozade.
The SPFs were out and about delivering piglets and everything was going pretty smoothly. True, the piglets had refused to follow the bucket into the trailer and I'd had to pick them up one-by-one, squealing and wriggling (the piglets, not me) and drop them into the small, but perfectly formed Ifor Williams trailer, while stepson Pat stood guard. But we had got down in time for the ferry and made all our rendezvous with the minimum of fuss.
Extracting the piglets proved to be just as tricky as putting them in, involving me climbing in the front door of the trailer grabbing a leg and hauling reluctant, protesting animal out. There were 12 to deliver and each time I felt as if I'd done a couple of rounds with Giant Haystacks.
I'd have been all right had I not spent the previous two days mixing concrete. We (stepson Pat, friend Eric and myself) were putting in the kitchen floor, the first step in the renovation of the house. Sal always tells me I charge straight in, bull-at-gate style, and then wonder why I'm in pain afterwards. She has a point, but I don't quite see how you can ease yourself in when mixing concrete.
Anyway, the upshot was that after three days of very physical activity, I had not only the highest respect for builders, labourers and real farmers, but arms that wouldn't really work.
On the plus side, 12 of the piglets are now settling in to new homes and the croft has some income. Two jobs well done.
A little light weeding today, I think.
* A couple of references may be incomprehensible to non-Brits or anyone under 40 who never saw the wrestling on World of Sport. I suggest you Google Shirley Crabtree.