Friday, 28 September 2007

Must have been smoking

Listening to: N17 (Saw Doctors)
What's for tea?: chickpea and aubergine curry
Eggs?: Nope
Broken anything today?: Not yet

It's nice to know it's not just me. A friend (let's call him Mr D) called by earlier this week to help out with some DIY issues.

He'd been on a painting and decorating mission at a nearby houseand was just about to leave when, forgetting that Orkney houses are built to suit the average Munchkin, he copped a fearful crack across the forehead.

That may have had something to do with his decision to try to reverse up our lane.

There's a ditch that runs along the length of the lane and. . . yep, you've guessed it, Mr D's Volkswagen van ended up in it.

So we set about pushing, shoving, revving, rocking, pulling and so on, but nothing would shift it. It didn't help that Mr D was stumbling around, slurring his speech, eyes looking in different directions like he'd just done four rounds with Ricky Hatton, while I went down with a serious fit of the giggles.

I tried to squeeze Lennox past so I could give a tow, but stopped moments before getting it wedged in as well. A passing real farmer with tractor helped us out and was kind enough not to laugh.

We got Mr D indoors and gave him hot, sweet tea and tried to bring him back to Earth.

"Don't put that on your bloody blog," he slurred.

Don't worry, Mr D, your secret's safe with me.

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